Hello, it's been a while, hasn’t it? There’s so much going on that I haven’t updated you all on, but I think easing back into this whole blog writing is the way to go. And one way of doing that is talking about being young and disabled.
The title of this blog is a lyric from the song Open Arms by Jorge Rivera-Herrans, and you can listen to it here.
So, shall we barrel headfirst into it?
Certain stereotypes surround visually impaired or blind people, cane users, and Guide Dog owners. These can include varied views that many people have, and they are often reinforced by social media and cultural influences such as television or film. If you have a sight impairment, the perspective from the public is that you are completely blind and unable to do anything for yourself, so you must rely on others. There’s also an idea that you must be a certain age to have a visual impairment and that your other senses are also impaired. These stereotypes can be incredibly hurtful.
As many of you have guessed, I don’t fall into either of these categories, and that’s very confusing for some people. I’m almost 28 now. I’m registered blind but have some useful sight, and I’m transgender. I use a Guide Dog to get around and am fairly independent, so I can use public transport and go out by myself.
The amount of times people assume I’m either lying about my sight, assuming I’m training my Guide Dog or I’m completely blind is insane. It happens on a daily basis to the point I want to pull my hair out when I have to try and explain, justify or argue the fundamentals of my disability. Every day I have to justify why I use my Guide Dog or my long cane, why I have to hold my phone so close to my face and why my eyes wobble. I have been called ignorant when I haven’t understood something or misheard a question, I’ve been told I’m too young to have a visual impairment and don’t get me started on the people who assume my eye conditions are easily fixed.
Being young and having an invisible disability is difficult.
I have had a sight impairment since I was born. I will one day go blind altogether. I don’t know when this is going to happen. It might be in ten years; it might be tomorrow. Being told I’m too young to have a disability is like a kick to the face. I didn’t choose this; I manage with techniques and equipment which assist me with everything I do, it’s been trial and error, a lot of tears and hard work. But at the moment, I feel like there is just too much stereotyping, hypocrisy, and judging of people with disabilities, specifically visual impairment.
I grew up to be kind, not judging people before I know their story, why should my story be any different? Being young and disabled is a common thing. I have friends who are disabled; we studied together on my undergraduate degree, and I have friends from my master’s degree with mental health issues. Disability and mental health are not restricted to one age group; it’s across so many different generations, backgrounds, and personalities. Being young does not mean that these things do not happen to young people. Disabilities and mental health issues don’t care how young, old, poor, rich, popular, or ostracised you are. It just happens, and sometimes there is no explanation for it.
The responses I have received about my disability are from a wide range of people of all ages but from a particular generation of people, meaning old enough to know better, can be very hurtful at times. It can make me not want to step outside my front door because I am so scared of what kind of abuse and discrimination I might receive. I either get the patronising response of ‘Oh, you’re so brave, you’re such an inspiration, it’s amazing you get out and about.’ Or I get the judging, questioning responses of ‘Why can’t you have surgery? If you’re doing a degree, how can you see to do it? You don’t look blind. Are you training that dog?’
These are but a few comments, and to get these kinds of comments on a daily basis is soul-crushing. I appreciate genuine people asking about my visual impairment, and I don’t mind telling them about my eye conditions. It’s when those ignorant people try to shove their opinions down my throat that I get upset and angry. Visual impairment is not black and white, it’s not that you are either sighted or you are blind; there is a massive spectrum of visual impairment. The need for society to label someone with a disability or mental health issues is demeaning and unjustified. I might be young, I might be disabled and have anxiety and depression, but what does age have to do with me going out, meeting friends or going shopping with my Guide Dog? Nothing.
Even now, in 2024, there is not enough representation of young and disabled people in the media, and I want to change that. I can’t speak for all disabilities, mental health issues or visually impaired people, I can only speak for myself, my experiences and my feelings. But if you are reading this and you are disabled, maybe you’re in a wheelchair or are hearing impaired, or maybe you’re visually impaired too, no matter your disability, no matter your age, you never have to justify yourself to anyone. The kinds of people who expect you to explain or reason why you are using a Guide Dog, why you have a Blue Badge and park in the disabled spaces or sit in the priority seating on public transport are not worth the time of day. Disabled people and disabled young people cannot be typecast; disabilities and mental health affect people in so many different ways.
And why should it be anyone’s business? Voicing your opinion, particularly if it’s a negative one, can have harmful effects on disabled people. By telling me I’m too young to have a disability, I instantly feel like I am a burden on society, I overthink and try to play down my visual impairment. I shouldn’t; there’s no need for me to panic and worry just because someone can’t understand that visual impairments affect a wide range of people. Why shouldn’t I get my PhD and pursue my writing career whilst I still have some useful sight, I’m fully living my life, and I’m proud to say I’m a young disabled person because why not? I don’t feel ashamed of being disabled. It is the hand life has dealt me, I don’t know why, but it is. I refuse to back down, not use my voice for something good and make the most out of my disability. Being young and disabled is not just my label, I am a writer, an editor and a proof reader, I’m a friend, a brother, an uncle, a gamer and a lover of music. Just because my disability is constantly there, I use my Guide Dog every day, it does not define who I am. And it shouldn’t define you either.
It doesn’t matter if you are disabled or not, be kind to each other, don’t make assumptions and just do whatever it is you can and are comfortable with. At the end of the day, you must be happy in your own skin, try your best and don’t ever let anyone question, judge or throw hurtful comments at you.
Be brave, be scared, take time out for yourself, cry, protest the stereotypes, change perspectives, and show what you are capable of. No one should be made to feel like a second-class citizen. We have just as much right to live our lives to the fullest extent and do what we love best.
Most of all, be kind to each other.
I’ll leave you with these quotes,
When you hear the word ‘disabled,’ people immediately think about people who can’t walk or talk or do everything that people take for granted. Now, I take nothing for granted. But I find the real disability is people who can’t find joy in life and are bitter –Teri Garr.
I have had this desire my whole life to prove people wrong, to show them I could do things they didn’t think I could do – David A. Paterson.
Until the next time.
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